While my little man took a nap last week, I was browsing through Facebook...taking a break from unpacking boxes from our recent move. One of my amazing, strong mom friends posted this article from madison.citymomsblog.com. The title of the article read "Can I Be Honest? Sometimes, I Get Jealous"and it started off with "Dear Stay-At-Home Mom". I was curious so I started reading...
Now, I'm a Mom who works part timeand a Mom who stay at home part time. I put the Mompart first because during these short 15 months of actually having "Mom" as my title, I have realized that I am MOMat all times! Not only am I Mom when I am home and we are reading books or playing at the park, but I am Mom during my therapy sessions, most involved assessments and reports, and during my toughest meetings. I am also Mom anyway of the week, anytime of the day.
I went back to work, to a career I love, when my little man was 4 months old. I was so blessed to have the 4 months I had with him, but longed for more time at home with him. On the flip side, when I was on maternity leave, there was a little part of me that was concerned that I was letting my career I had worked so hard for slip. While I was going through this internal struggle (and it is ongoing...I hear it just keeps going on and on and on :) ), I was also receiving tons of "advice" from randompeople about how to parent my child!
It is one thing to get advice from family and friends...people who love you and love your child and want the best for you both. It is completely another thing to get "advice" from a random lady in Target when you are on a rare outing with your colicky 3 month old who is having a meltdown and you are trying all your techniques to soothe your baby and her advice is "have you tried feeding him...maybe you aren't holding him right...try this" hmmmm hands off the baby. Or a lady at the mall who sees your little man sleeping soundly in his baby carrier and proceeds to come up and tell you how he needs to be home and sleeping. It goes on and on and thankfully I have honestly forgotten most of the "advice" because at the time it was just too overwhelming and had me second guessing everything. I kept thinking that these people must have good intentions, but this isn't advice at all...this is judgment!
I am being judged for my baby crying too much, crying too loud, being too skinny, being too chunky, sleeping too much, not sleeping enough, and it goes on and on. Then when I went back to work, that opened up a new flood gate, "How could you ever leave your adorable baby?" "Aren't you sad you are going to miss milestones?"...
So when I read this article, I thought it was going to be an empowering article for Moms who stay at home, which I was eager to read because Moms who stay at home deserve tons of praise and support....but ALL moms need praise and support! Then I got to the second part of the article, where the author addressed Moms who work. The article is written as a letter to Stay a home moms from Working moms and then to Working moms from Stay at home moms.
Both "moms" say...
I guess I just wanted to let you know that I see you, and I recognize the sacrifices you’re making for your family.
I see you, and I support you. Keep it up, girl!
YES!!!!! Let's SUPPORT each other! Let's EMPOWER each other! Let's help each other along in this crazy and wonderful world of motherhood!
Thank you, Kim from madison.citymomsblog.com for posting this article.
All MAMAS OUT THERE....I SEE YOU! YOU ARE AMAZING! I SUPPORT YOU! GO YOU!
Do yourself a favor and read the whole article:
http://madison.citymomsblog.com/can-honest-sometimes-get-jealous/#lightbox/0/